Local author fair

Good story

Here's a true story from my dashing experience. I hope the doctor will forgive me.

I walk into Wendy's and open my phone; the order is a Frosty for Jesus. Now to be fair I recognized this as "hay-SEUSS" (which I pronounce "hay-ZEUS"), a Hispanic name, and I have no problem with it; but, I laugh a little at the idea of bringing a frosty to Jesus.

The worker, a pretty young Native American woman (forgive me if I'm wrong), was making about six or seven frosties. Another door-dasher came in and stood behind me, as I'd gotten there first. When she was done she asked me about my order, and I said, a frosty for Jesus. I laughed a little as I turned around and showed the other dasher my order. One of the more unusual ones, I said. He showed me his. TWO orders for Jesus, both of frosties! I told him we'd better be on our best behavior, and he laughed.

Turns out mine was going to the hospital. Out there, a doctor came out to claim it, and said he was Jesus. I told him I thought more were coming, and he said he knew that. What most likely happened was that he agreed to order them for every worker, and somebody walked in late. I got the late one, but got there first, because I'd been closer to Wendy's when the order came in. Or perhaps the single one had been first, the others an afterthought.

True story, still gives me a chuckle.

trick or treat

Trick or Treat, alive and well in Galesburg, at least at the corner of Broad and Mary (in picture). Again, we got bags and bags of candy, and ran out.

During part of the hour, I drove around town on unrelated errands. Other neighborhoods were virtually empty. Some had a few scattered kids. One house that had a huge display - over a dozen balloons and statues - seemed to have plenty of kids. Maybe the whole neighborhood went there for its entertainment.

At Broad and Mary it was a madhouse. Cars came from all over and parked near the corner. It was also busy two blocks over, on Prairie. Between Mary and Losey there seemed to be several shows put on by the houses, with lots of kids milling around outside. It was definitely a festive atmosphere.

Our own approach was to get four or five bags of candy and give two to each kid; as I said, we ran out in a couple of hours. OK no problem, we did the best we could. We couldn't put on a whole show or out-candy the splashier neighbors. I'm not sure if the Losey-Osage-Mary set of houses is organized or not but it seemed to me they were "THE" place to be or at least one of the premier attractions of the evening. They were raking in the customers and the "likes."

We rarely have cars parked on Broad; tonight, there were cars all up and down Broad, and on all the side streets. One kid after another came up our walk, which is kind of overgrown, creepy, difficult to navigate. They were troopers. Many of them had been at it for a while. I don't know about the late-night crowd; we missed them.

And my 16-year-old came home with an entire bag. Whether it came out even or not, remains to be judged. These days, I suspect, we're handing out more than we're hauling in.

deco report

My focus this year is on what I see, as I drive around a lot, and have seen much of the town. Granted, I'm based more on the north side, with my house near Broad and Mary, the epicenter of trick-or-treating and possibly Halloween decorating too.

First, to separate out political decorating from fall decorating. There seem to be equal numbers of Harris signs and Trump signs. Harris ones have ones that go with it: Eric, Amor, etc. while Trump has Judge Joe, etc. Never have I seen crossover, which used to be common: someone liking a Democrat for President, but a Republican for a lower office. No, that doesn't happen anymore. These signs are common but are never mixed with fall deco either.

On the fall deco front, it occurs to me that there is an old-fashioned direction for fall deco. This includes real pumpkins, bales of hay, old cornstalks, scarecrows, etc. This is very rare but still out there. Actually it's my favorite; I could do with a single ear of indian corn. But it is rarely mixed with the flashier stuff or with the political signs. No not rarely, never. A very small minority of houses have a small traditional fall display.

The problem with the balloons and statues is that once people get started they have trouble stopping. Some houses have twelve, up to twenty statues or balloons. Among the balloon statues some don't make it and lie like humps of plastic; maybe somebody has punctured them. These statues can be anything but are usually not fall-themed (pumpkins). They are more likely ghosts, vampires, dragons, skeletons.

Speaking of skeletons the obsession with death is really one of the strongest themes. In fact some decorators have taken joy from mixing death with even the most joyful occasions: a bride covered with blood, or a child, or a woman and baby carriage, blood all over it, etc. Express yourself! I think it's kind of gruesome, but I'm also curious what they are thinking. I guess Halloween gives you permission to be death, put it out there in all its forms, show the world that death trumps everything. There is not a lot of vandalism on these massive displays, that I can tell; the punctured balloons are just as likely to be leaky or defective. One can decorate, or over-decorate, or fill up one's lawn. No problem.

The dragons and the purple are what I detect as a slight innovation from last year. One house on my street has all purple lights; very pretty. I always thought of purple as a Mardi-Gras color, but it can be fall too I guess. Brown, black, orange, white, those are the usual. Brown and green started appearing last year as ones to help highlight the white, black and orange. But my question is, where did the dragons come from? Are they just because you're allowed any fantasy you want? Is there some association with fall or something else?

People who carve pumpkins now (Oct. 10) will find them good and rotten by Halloween, and though that's not all bad, those who wait to buy them after the middle of the month may find it's too late, all the pumpkins are gone. Some people buy them by the wagonload. This one house in Abingdon sells whole wagons of them as far as I can tell. They come in from the countryside in wagonloads, and who has any idea how sincere they are? I bought one - as I said, I'm a minimalist, and traditionalist. Actually I don't really believe in deco at all. I'm just kind of studying it, and enjoying it. Maybe if I'm in this town long enough, it'll win me over and I'll start going all out too.

decoration season

Now that I've seen the first full-flung fall decoration of the year, it's time to make some generalizations and set out some goals for the season. Generalizations first.

It's not that the Christmas deco has abated any, it's more that the fall deco has really caught on. There are lots of possibilities: ghosts, dead people, zombies, monsters, skeletons, etc., lots to work with. It's a season when people are out, enjoying the fresh air and the turning of the trees; in fact, the turning of the trees adds something to the general effect. The zombie/death themes really appeal to a whole generation of decorators who, like their parents, have nothing better to do in a small town but decorate the heck out of things, but who, like their peers, reject all traditional methods and really want to take off on their own path.

I sensed that people couldn't wait until Sept. 1 to get started, but I didn't see my first fall deco until about Sept. 1. That's two months early. But no problem, get it on up there so we can see it. While you can only do Christmas lights in red and green, in fall you can use purple and especially orange, and blood colors, and go to town. So get it on out there and we'll come around and look.

The first full-fledged one, a whole yard-full, is on Monroe just south of Fremont, on the east side of the street. I'm not sure if it's the first one altogether. I know of one in my neighborhood, on Cedar between Osage and Fremont, and when that guy gets going it's something to see; he'll probably give us a yardful. I say get it out there. It's artistic; it's expressive; if you're all about death and vampires or zombies we can handle it. We can at least judge and evaluate on our own terms.

Here are my goals. It's kind of like being stuck behind a train, looking at the graffiti, and saying, I really want to know more about this so I have some idea of what I'm looking at. We can all start with what we like, and say, that one's nice. We can all admit that we have no idea of what it actually takes to construct a zombie that will hold up to the weather and still be haunting, glowing, etc. But I'd like to use this site to explore some of these questions. I think we probably have as good fall deco as any town and I'd like to just point out where it's good, keep track of it, commend its artists, etc. I'd actually like to do the same for train graffiti but I assure you I'm nowhere near close to qualified. You'll have to accept my spontaneous offerings and random opinions about what's good and what's not. I have no hostility about it whatsoever. There's no point in telling people they should stick with mangers and Christian scenes; some people even sport Trump flags like there's some sense in letting the country be run over by a rapist pedophile fraud draft dodger. In light of reality, what harm is a few zombies?

So let's get on with it. Go out and deco. I'll be watching. I am, after all, a door-dasher, and I get on a lot of these streets, often. My goal is to ultimately know what I'm talking about,

Dasher's dilemma

Here's a dasher problem, and kind of Galesburg-specific geography question. I have a woman's order, from Wendy's, going out to a nursing home in Knoxville, the one that's out Market Street a ways. The dasher app sends me south on Henderson to the end of the road where it will turn me left on highway ten and go to Knoxville that way. It sometimes, in similar circumstances, will put me on the interstate which is how I might have done it if I were alone. But I usually do what the dasher app tells me to do, figuring it's better to be able to say, when it's all over, that I was doing what I was told.

So a little ways past Monmouth I get a call from the woman who says, when you get to this nursing home, find the visitor parking lot over on the side. I've pulled over a little to take the call but up ahead I see this train, crossing south Henderson, and this is the crossing that's way out south by Louisville. It's way out south. Not pulling over would not have got me past that train; I would have to wait.

Two problems I could see right away. First, it was going slowly. Not too slow, and not slowing down, but very slow, maybe ten. It was actually speeding up a little, but not much. But the second problem was the big one - it was HUGE. It went forever, with no end in sight.

Now you give the train about double the time since he's going about half the usual speed; it's going to take twice as long. But this was longer it seemed than even your usual double train, which has engines in the middle and which happen when they combine two mile-and-a-half trains together. This one seemed to be three or four trains long, with no sign of engines in the middle to pick up the process.

The dilemma is this: way out before you get to that train track, if you give up and turn around, how do you actually get to Knoxville? I couldn't come up with a solution. Going out Monmouth would be the wrong direction and might not assure me that I even got past the train. Going back to Main and ambling through downtown would take forever, but at least would get me under any oncoming train; then I could take Seminary or Grand but it just seemed so long. I just sat there. Maybe to my peril.

When I got out to the nursing home there was no visitor lot in sight, nothing. I drove around twice. I got it to her eventually but felt bad 'cause it took so long. A cold Wendys. At least she got one of those magical-colored drinks they're all making these days. A bad dash, you might say. But I've actually had pretty good luck lately, just staying in Galesburg.